20 Something Dating: Vulnerability

Another series topic I would like to introduce is "20 Something Dating." This topic is usually a really hot topic in all of my friend groups. Women and men alike are all trying to figure this out and sort of, kind of make it work.

For today's post, I want to talk about a topic that I think has become something we're not only missing in dating--but in all of our relationships. Vulnerability. We constantly see images of those who seemingly have it all. We have friends that seemingly have it all. And we are all trying to obtain it 'all.' What does it really feel or look like to 'have it all?' No one can or will tell you that--so we're chasing this ideal of what success in all facets looks like. No one will be vulnerable enough to say that yes all of this traveling is amazing but my relationships at home are suffering. Or no one will be vulnerable enough to say that having a lot of money is awesome but I am constantly anxious about what could happen if I can't maintain this income. No one will be vulnerable enough to say yes, my relationship looks amazing on Instagram but my partner doesn't respect me. As long as it looks great on the surface everyone thinks everything is great.

No one wants to be vulnerable enough to expose themselves out fear. Fear that if their flaws or faults are displayed, who they've built themselves up to be could crumble. 20 Somethings are less successful in the dating realm because we have stopped dating each other and started dating our egos. Keeping these personas alive have become more important than anything. People would rather let a relationship fail before they let their image to outsiders look bad.

For 20 Somethings in dating it seems like we're unable to breakdown the facade. We're afraid to be vulnerable and share the flaws. The only way to make a real human connection OR realize there is no connection is to allow yourself to be a bit transparent. And really see what could or couldn't be there with a partner. 

I hope to explore more aspects of 20 Something dating with you all. And I would LOVE for a male writer to write in and give some perspective. This is request is not limited to heterosexual relationships. I want us to explore it all. Because like I said--I don't know it all and my point of view is directly effected by my own perspective. And there is a lot we all can learn from each other.

So write me at brandisjaniesedesigns@gmail.com. If you have a dating topic you'd like to explore write in the comments! Share this post and encourage your friends to send in a topic request.

Don't be afraid to expose your flaws 20 Somethings! Imperfections are beautiful and real.

xx,

brandisjaniese

Brandis Haynes